a sister's love

reposted: December 9,2009

a day before the 40 days of my brother ron, as i look back on the days that passed by, i just feel that the days are running so fast and yet the same amount of pain remains..it's unfair if i may say,how can the same amount of pain remain when the days are flying so fast?can't the pain pass as fast as the days go by?

trying to be ok everyday, trying to pretend that everything is going on so well, who am i cheating? everyday we are longing for him,everyday we miss him..trying to be strong for each other, we try as much as we can to go on and live each day as normal as we can..

sometimes, i feel like am ok, like am ready to go on and to finally let go of everything..but when the pain strikes again, i feel like am a little child, helpless and lost..For so long now, im holding back the tears, trying to conceal the pain that i feel, i always wanted to look strong infront of everyone, specially infront of my family,to mama and tata who i know, of all people are hurting the most..but just like everyone else,i have to admit that i am WEAK..i am in pain, i am hurting..it's never easy to pretend that everything is ok when you know deep in your heart that you are broken.

if i could only shout,if i could only say what this broken heart is feeling, i would...the pain of losing someone you love and knowing that no matter you do, you'll never be able to see that person again..it will kill you from inside..


Ron,
they say that after forty days, the soul of the departed one will finally leave, and now i wonder..will you miss us the way we miss you?will you also long for our presence?..Ron, ate's heart is broken, every now and then, i think of you, i miss you, up to now i wonder, what if the tragedy never happened? i would probably be spending much of my time with you,ill eat with you, talk to you, jam with you, or even drink with you.. i know it's useless to say all of these, because i know that i will never get the chance to do all of these..but if i only could.. believe me i would take that chance because i was never given the chance to spend time with you :( i miss you :(

it will be Forty days..
Forty days of sadness,pains and hurts..
or if i may say..it will be Forty days without you :(

we miss you ron and forever we will be missing you..
in our minds, and in our hearts forever you will be..
your memories,your ways..
we will forever treasure and remember...

iloveyouron :(